Today the BabyCenter App on my phone advised I “do Kegel exercises.” I’ve known about these for a long time, because when I teach Pre-natal Yoga, I sometimes offer a moment-of-silence to “practice” these fun little down-under moves – It’s an opportunity to make mom’s laugh in class and remind them to work every single little muscle in their body as they Om and Shanti.
(very small side note: So hard to focus on my blog when Iron Man 2 in on TV. Robert Downey Jr. is so
It’s always been easy for me to tell the mom’s I teach to Kegel without really having to focus too much on it myself. So, when I got my reminder today I thought “Oh fun, now I get to practice what I preach.” I found a comfortable position on my bed and started Kegeling while I read the description on BabyCenter.com…
The following is definitely cheek-reddening and slightly RATED R, but mostly just a giggle-burst! —
If you’re not sure you’ve got it one way to check is by inserting a clean (make sure your hands aren’t dirty
ladies!) finger into your vagina before doing a Kegel. If you feel pressure around your finger, you’re on the right track. Or try a Kegel during lovemaking and ask your partner if he can feel it. If you’re doing it correctly, he’ll be able to feel you “hug” his penis. (A big Carebear wennie hug will make any lovemaking experience extra special!) — I hope someone else finds this funny besides me.
The reason for this whole story is that I did my Kegel exercises for about five minutes and suddenly I started to get the worst stomachache! Then the stomachache turned to cramps, and the cramps turned to me lying in bed the rest of the night leaving laundry half-done. Which, BTW, there should be a law against doing laundry when pregnant. Pregnant women should not walk up and down the stairs multiple times carrying heavy baskets full of soils. It’s like, for the first time in my life, I had to stop half-way up the stairs to c a t c h m y b r e a t h. I’m only 30 and I teach Yoga, I should know a thing or two about breathing, but boy (or girl), was I taken by surprise with this no-air thing, it’s for real!
Lastly, I’ve noticed an immediate rise in appetite. Especially at night. Last night Baby Kim Jr. wanted cereal before bedtime (with unsweatened Almond Milk).
…and tonight She/He wanted Z-Pizza.
Yum Yum: Gluten-free crust with half Casablanca (I ordered caramelized onions instead of artichokes), and half BBQ Chicken pizza.
Over and out or until the next sudden urge to jot down everything I do while pregnant – I’m so happy!